A shoulder to lean on...

I read this little tidbit from Patsy Clairmont today:

"I can imagine Elizabeth, soon-to-be mom of John the baptist, drawing Mary, soon-to-be mother of Jesus, onto her aging shoulder. Two women, the old and the young, embracing in mutual identification. Two women seeking solace in each others company. Two women honorably connecting to one another. Sisters of divine circumstance shouldering the future of humanity."

I cannot imagine the fear and the uncertainty that they faced alone. But God was so good to them by giving them each other to help each other through a scary and uncertain time. God was good then.....and He still is. He still places people in our paths to help us through rough patches.

Thank you, Lord.

It's the most wonderful time of the year!

Well let me correct myself and say....

"I love this time of year until I am down to the wire and running out of gift ideas and then I just freak out!"

However, this year is different. We are making a change. I refuse to let the commercialization of Christmas get to me. This year its not about gifts...its about "The Gift". Purposely making time to reflect on the real reason why we celebrate this holiday. And for the first time in a long time...I couldn't be any more excited.

Simplify is my new favorite word, but more than that I love the peace that envelopes me when I say or hear that word. Simplify. Dear hubby and I are making most of our gifts this year....giving up crowded stores and snippy shoppers for a quiet night at home working in the wood shop or painting in the craft room. The receivers are getting more than a hand painted sign or a keepsake box they are being prayed for. With a stroke of the ole' paintbrush a prayer of thanksgiving for them is being lifted. Thanking God for their presence in our life. Asking God to bless them and their family and friends. Asking God to use them in mighty ways.

I pray that this is the gift that keeps giving throughout the year...not just at Christmas. He is "The Gift" that keeps on giving and how can anyone top that? You can't! I am just so glad it didn't take me until Christmas to remember that this year... :)

May you find peace in the simple everyday things this Christmas season!

Blessings,

Thanksgiving

There is much to be thankful for although this time of year it seems I don't like to be thankful.

Since a Thanksgiving Day six years ago.....I tend to overlook what I am thankful for and like to wallow in what was lost.

I am embarrassed at how UN-Christianlike that sounds. At how ungrateful it sounds but for the last few Thanksgivings its just how I have felt. It is just like my body knows and remembers and I find myself in a hole somehow. One that I don't like being in. So this time...I am fighting it. Pushing forward...knowing in my heart of hearts the He had and does have my best interests at heart. And this week I will focus on my blessings which are many....

.....that the child we lost has a front row seat on the lap of their heavenly Father.

.....for the friends and family who help me through still difficult times knowing when I just need the silence.

.....for the joy that comes after the rain

......for a hubby who is ever so patient with me and loves me despite my many faults and inadequacies.

......for a job that on occasion really drives me crazy.

.....for quiet time spent soaking in His presence.

......for unexpected laughter that drives me to happy tears.

......for phone calls from mom & dad to make sure I know that I am loved.


May your blessings be many this Thanksgiving week~and may God show himself to you in mighty mighty ways this week.

Gifts overflow

71. the sound of laughter

72. the sun after a season of rain

73. fall decorations

74. the whisper of the wind

75. unexpected emails

76. a cup of hot tea

77. a fire to warm the body, heart and soul

78. curling up with a good book

79. a morning call to Mom

80. a day to just explore

81. warm apple dumplings on a chilly afternoon

82. the tapping of the rain of the roof

83. natures lullaby

84. a memory of good times past

85. dancing to the song in my heart (while no one is watching!)

86. a deer grazing

87. cinnamon candles

88. His words that make me want to KNOW more

89. His love that makes me want to BE more

Not so Mrs. Nice Gal....

Did you ever think you knew someone and then all of a sudden, as you look deeper, you find out that that someone is not as nice as you thought they were? This week that was me..... in the world of Sarai (AKA Sarah).

In my mind of children's parables and bible stories I have always thought of Sarah as a wonderful woman used by God to help fulfill God's story by giving birth to Isaac. God fulfilling a promise He made to Sarah and Abraham. I am not sure why my brain did not remember the rest of the story (as Paul Harvey would say). Imagine my surprise when I found out some other things that were going on here....

It all started with a promise in Genesis 15:

² But Abram said, "O Sovereign LORD, what can you give me since I remain childless and the one who will inherit ^c]">[c] my estate is Eliezer of Damascus?" ³ And Abram said, "You have given me no children; so a servant in my household will be my heir."

⁴ Then the word of the LORD came to him: "This man will not be your heir, but a son coming from your own body will be your heir." ⁵ He took him outside and said, "Look up at the heavens and count the stars—if indeed you can count them." Then he said to him, "So shall your offspring be."

⁶ Abram believed the LORD, and he credited it to him as righteousness.

We quickly see that as time rolls on...impatience sets in.....and Sarah starts taking matters in her own hands. Forgetting the promise that was given~she tried to fix it herself. I am sure she had the best of intentions at the time~right? Genesis 16:

¹ Now Sarai, Abram's wife, had borne him no children. But she had an Egyptian maidservant named Hagar; ² so she said to Abram, "The LORD has kept me from having children. Go, sleep with my maidservant; perhaps I can build a family through her."
Abram agreed to what Sarai said. ³ So after Abram had been living in Canaan ten years, Sarai his wife took her Egyptian maidservant Hagar and gave her to her husband to be his wife. ⁴ He slept with Hagar, and she conceived.

I am sure that Abraham had the best of intentions too cause he probably just wanted to please his wife (Ahem- yeah ok)...moving on.... So Sarah takes matters into her own hands and here is where it happens- just like the Jefferson Starship song- the storms start brewing in her eyes.

This is why Sarah should have been careful about what she asked for- cause low and behold - SHE GOT IT! Then she found out she didn't want it-but it was too late to turn back:

When she knew she was pregnant, she began to despise her mistress. ⁵ Then Sarai said to Abram, "You are responsible for the wrong I am suffering. I put my servant in your arms, and now that she knows she is pregnant, she despises me. May the LORD judge between you and me."

Now we see her true colors shining through. Does she look inward and see what she's done?...no...instead she looks outward and blames everybody else. She treated Hagar like an outcast, causing her to flee for her safety. Sarah doesn't seem to be such a wonderful woman destined to fulfill God's promise for her and Abraham now...does she?

Perhaps this bothers me so, because I can look at her and see me in the reflection. How many times do I stand on the promises of my Savior, only to try to make things happen on my own. It is me, at times, failing to make things happen and then I blame everyone around me and make them help me "fix it". And yes, it is me, who runs to the phone before humbling myself at His throne- and patiently waiting for His promises to be fulfilled in my life.

This story is not without hope though. I see a promise in it that shines brighter than my pride.

Like Sarah, we do not have to be perfect for God to love us and use us for His purpose. So, if he can use a woman like her...there just may be hope for me yet!

All I have to do is:

I Want To Be Just Like Her....

When I look at her life before children...its like looking in a mirror.

She had much love in her life. Her husband loved her so much, I don't think it mattered to him whether they had children or not. He loved her regardless. It reminds me of my dear husband and how much he loves me, regardless of our barrenness.

However, with joy, comes sorrow. Yes, she was loved but she was also grieved by what she did not have. During certain seasons in my life, I feel the same way. This time of year is hard for me. Six years ago at this time, hubby and I were expecting. Unfortunately, we did not have a happy ending. We still remain barren. Mostly because of fear. Fear of "what if" it happens again. We are hesitant to step back onto the roller coaster of emotions that we have experienced in the past. We have grown, though, in ways that may not have been possible if we have not traveled down this path.

I believe that Hannah knew all about that. I believe she experienced the full spectrum of emotions that I have been through and still go through at times. We read in 1 Samuel how she cried out to God in her anguish. So much so, that at times, she couldn't even make full words or sentences come out of her mouth. She never took her eyes of God. I envy her.

In the midst of her sorrow she vowed to God, that if he would bless her with a child, she would give that child back to Him. To make a long story short, she did and without hesitation. Because of her faithfulness she was blessed with much more. Looking at her story, its hard to imagine praying for something so hard and then in the end having to lose it all over again. In hindsight, that is what we did, though. We ended up giving him or her back to the one who created them. I find comfort in that now~ after all these years. We did not at the time freely do that- like Hannah did. That is where our story differs.

Hannah was so many things that I desire to be. I keep telling myself to take it one day at a time- I am still a work in progress. Hannah had so many beautiful characteristics- no wonder the Lord was gracious to her....

She was a woman of her word...(trustworthy)

She was faithful......(she never stopped communing with her Savior)

She was nurturing....(after she gave Samuel over to God and left him with Eli she contained to pray for her son and to visit him once a year)

She was sensitive...(her husbands other wife taunted her when she was barren-driving her to tears many times-she always went to the Lord with her grief and her tears though)

She was loving......(she loved her family with all her heart and soul and never stopped praying and caring for them-even when they were out of her sight)

I look at her story and I want to be like her. I want to run to my Savior first and not wallow in my pain and grief. I want to nurture those around me and show them how good God really is. I want to allow myself to be sensitive so that I can help someone else who may going through a rough time. I want Him to use me like he used Hannah- for His glory. I want others to see Him in me, like I see Him in her.

Help me, Lord. To be just like her.......

Abigail- Peacemaker or Push-over?

Abigail didn't live an easy life. Chances were she married for money and wealth and that got her a whole lot of nowhere.

1 Samuel 25:3 tells us that her husband, Nabal, was surly and mean in his dealings. I am sure that didn't stop with his "business dealings". He probably wasn't the easiest person to live with. She probably put up with alot from the man whose name means "Fool".

But it never stopped her from protecting her own. It didn't change who she was deep down inside. In fact, it made her stronger.

When we first meet Abigail, she shows up as no more than Nabal's wife. It doesn't take long to see she really is so much more.

While David was in the desert, he and his men had protected Nabal and his sheep by making a wall around Nabal and his property. Come sheep-shearing time all David wanted was some food and water for him and his men.

But that Nabal, was a fool. Without a second to think, he got right up on his high-horse and asked why he should give up what he had for only God knows who.

Nabal answered David's servants, "Who is this David? Who is this son of Jesse? Many servants are breaking away from their masters these days. 11 Why should I take my bread and water, and the meat I have slaughtered for my shearers, and give it to men coming from who knows where?" 1 Samuel 25:10-11

You can only imagine how that sat with David when he got word of Nabal's response. He immediately began heading in Nabal's direction to take the wind right out of Nabal's and his mens sails.

Fearing the wrath of Nabal's actions, one of the servants ran to Abigail to intervene. Without a moment of hesitation she was on her way to meet David and his men to make peace. She knew her husbands attitude had risked all his holdings and placed her in a difficutl position- yet her dependence did not did not lay in her husband but with God.

Abigail lost no time. She took two hundred loaves of bread, two skins of wine, five dressed sheep, five seahs of roasted grain, a hundred cakes of raisins and two hundred cakes of pressed figs, and loaded them on donkeys. Then she told her servants, "Go on ahead; I'll follow you." But she did not tell her husband Nabal. 1 Samuel 25:18-19

As soon as she reached David she fell to her knees, her face to the ground and begged.....

She fell at his feet and said: "My lord, let the blame be on me alone. Please let your servant speak to you; hear what your servant has to say. 25 May my lord pay no attention to that wicked man Nabal. He is just like his name—his name is Fool, and folly goes with him. But as for me, your servant, I did not see the men my master sent. 1 Samuel 25:24-25

She understood that David was doing God's work, and she supported that. David was amazed at Abigail's faith and praised her for her quick actions. Her words reminded David of the bigger picture.

Please forgive your servant's offense, for the LORD will certainly make a lasting dynasty for my master, because he fights the LORD's battles. Let no wrongdoing be found in you as long as you live. 1 Samuel 25:28

David turned aside his wrath because of Abigail's response. But while she was making peace, Nabal was throwing a party. When she returned, he was drunk, so she waited til the next morning to inform him of what she had done. He went ballistic, threw a fit and ended up dying, probably from a heart attack or a stroke.

Once David heard of Nabal's death he sent for Abigail and asked her to become his wife. Here we see her move from a fools wife to a king's bride.

In Abigail, we see how intelligent and how faithful she was. She did not let a difficult relationship get in the way of her walk with the Lord. And she didn't let it change who she was. We see how she let God bring peace and tranquility to her situation. And through her story we can also see that once we've passed through the troubles, God gives us a better life that we ever expected.

Who are the Nabal's in your life and do you react like Abigail when confronted?