Behold, I am the Lord, the God of all flesh; is there anything too hard for Me?-Jeremiah 32:27 (Amplified)
No Lord...there is nothing too hard for you. However, lately I am having trouble letting it all at your feet. It seems my head is filled with doubt and fear and worry and I cannot seem to make sense of anything. I know that I am not living a life worthy of the sacrifice you made for me..help me to see things more clearly.
In less than two weeks, hubby and I will be celebrating 10 years of marriage. We have come so far in our relationship and our walk with you. We have been blessed beyond measure and so now I worry when the other shoe my drop. Don't get me wrong God, we have had our share of hardships like Daddy's quadruple bypass, DH heart condition (since he was born), a miscarriage and watching many loved ones move on to their eternal home. You saw us through all these things and I wonder how we did get through it without falling to apart.
It seems I am entering another season of unknowns and I am having a hard time hearing you. I NEED to hear from you. Help me listen and obey your leading.
I am in the in between. I am not sure where I fit and I need you to show me how to proceed.
Help me to give in and let go.
Cause you are the God of all flesh and there is nothing too hard for you!
Love,
your daughter
Julie
Monday, July 26, 2010
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Blessed Beyond Measure
Its been two weeks since I have had time to sit and list the abundance of blessings in my life. The list is long this week...for this I am thankful. For when I remember all the blessings....my fears and worries dissipate.
Gifts 171-205
*big puffy clouds that dance across a right blue sky
*the serenade of a sweet birds song
*the sound of water that reminds me of how His love washes over me
*happy fur babies that greet me at the door
*time spent with dear hubby
*planting a seed
*watching it grow
*chasing God
*nuggets of truth slipped into my day
*prayers whispered in the dark
*gift of creation-our glimpse of His handiwork
*nieces on their graduation day
*time spent with friends
*a chat with an old neighbor
*getting to know a new neighbor
*dephiniums in bloom
*a job well done
*bluebirds playing
*the smell of a cool spring evening
*sugar peas fresh from the garden
*the name of Jesus (just saying His name makes a bad day better)
*summer rain quenching dry soil
*longs talks late into the night
*stars shimmering
*blue hydrangeas
*the gift of time
*an opportunity
*silly giggles
*baby kitten finding a loving home
*safe travels
*words of life that finally stick in this forgetful mind
*beef kabobs grilled to perfection
*healthy family
*answered prayers
If you haven't listed your blessings lately...won't you consider starting? Join the community here.
I pray that at the end of your day you will be found reflecting on all the good in your life.....
Blessings,
Gifts 171-205
*big puffy clouds that dance across a right blue sky
*the serenade of a sweet birds song
*the sound of water that reminds me of how His love washes over me
*happy fur babies that greet me at the door
*time spent with dear hubby
*planting a seed
*watching it grow
*chasing God
*nuggets of truth slipped into my day
*prayers whispered in the dark
*gift of creation-our glimpse of His handiwork
*nieces on their graduation day
*time spent with friends
*a chat with an old neighbor
*getting to know a new neighbor
*dephiniums in bloom
*a job well done
*bluebirds playing
*the smell of a cool spring evening
*sugar peas fresh from the garden
*the name of Jesus (just saying His name makes a bad day better)
*summer rain quenching dry soil
*longs talks late into the night
*stars shimmering
*blue hydrangeas
*the gift of time
*an opportunity
*silly giggles
*baby kitten finding a loving home
*safe travels
*words of life that finally stick in this forgetful mind
*beef kabobs grilled to perfection
*healthy family
*answered prayers
If you haven't listed your blessings lately...won't you consider starting? Join the community here.
I pray that at the end of your day you will be found reflecting on all the good in your life.....
Blessings,
Thursday, June 10, 2010
Gypsy's and nudgings
I left work on Tuesday night the same way I always do…at the same time. However my venture home on this night took a slight turn and it still has me replaying it over and over in my mind.
I left work, caught up in my own head with the days events and worries that seem to cloud my already overly active mind. I made a right at the local Weis Market grocery store and that is when I saw her.
Gypsy girl.
She was walking towards the end of the median with a kitten in her arms and a cardboard sign that I could not read. She was dressed in a long flowing skirt and dreadlocks and looked like she just got back from Woodstock. No bags with her- just a kitten on a leash and a look in her eyes of sadness. She couldn’t have been more than 19. Immediately I wondered how she got here to where she was.
Did she not have a family who loved her and wanted her? Did she not see eye to eye with her family and decided that she could do better on her own? Did she think she had the world by the tail and now it was too late to turn back? Perhaps she fell in love with a boy who stole all her childhood dreams…maybe he used her then left her with nothing. Maybe she never heard of the One who knit her together in her mothers womb…or counts all the hairs on her head.
I was in the midst of traffic so I could not pull off to the side – I had to continue in the line of traffic up the hill. The light turned red and I watched her from my side mirror. A truck driver stopped at the light at the bottom of the hill….must have offered her some money…she ran over than ran back. All the while as I am watching this transpire I feel a gentle nudging that said:
“Go Back”.
My response was “But I have to turn left”
“Go back”
I made the left at the green light, traveled about a mile to my husbands place of business. After discussing what this was he told me to go back if I felt I needed to. Just see what the sign said and maybe give her a fresh bottle of water and a little bit of cash. I went back but I couldn’t find her…anywhere. I turned into the Weis parking lot scanning all the cubbyholes and places that one might use for shelter. I slowly drove around the entire building.
She was gone.
My heart sank. I had failed. Failed to react immediately to a nudging that could not be explained with “mans eyes”. And for the rest of the night I said silent prayers for that girl. That she would come to know the fullness of God’s love and find shelter in her storm of life.
I woke up on Wednesday and she was still on my mind. I searched for her as I drove to work keeping my eyes peeled for her. I am not sure what I was going to say or do if I found her but I searched anyway. Perhaps subconsciously I wanted to right my wrong of not following His prompting from the get go. I still don’t know what it was all about.
I got to work and then I heard the rest of the story…the flip side.
I settled in and got things caught up and then I called my best friend who sits just over the cubicle wall. I know she normally travels the same way home from work as I do so I asked her if she went right or left out of the parking lot that night.
She informed me that she turned left cause she had errands to run but had to turn around and go to Wal-Mart (which is right across the highway from Weis). Then she asked the question..
“Did you see the Gypsy’s?”
I froze.
“You mean there was more than one?”
She went on to tell me that when she pulled into the Wal-Mart parking lot she noticed a school bus parked (hidden from view from the highway) stategically against the retaining wall. The bus was painted over to look like something from the 60’s with peace signs everywhere and it was filled with a ton of junk. She said there must have been 15 of them-mostly girls with two older men. All of them had either a dog or a cat with them. No doubt to tug on the heartstrings of animal lovers. The man “in charge” appeared to be a scruffy looking man in his late 50’s. Apparently the girls would go out to panhandle by themselves so not to draw attention to the group of them. My girlfriend said it reminded her of the people that followed the guy down in Waco Texas.
Right there my mouth dropped and my heart sank. Immediately I questioned whether the nudging I felt was from God or was I just being duped. I must admit a little bit of anger rose up in me as I saw this as just one more instance where people would rather beg and steal than to get an honest job and work for a living like the rest of humanity does.
Then I was reminded. BFF told me that even if I would have found the girl that I went back to find, whatever I would have done for her would have been done from a pure heart. A heart that longed to follow the leading of her Lord. Perhaps there was a reason why I didn’t find her. Perhaps it was a test to see if I really would go back. I don’t know.
What I do know is there is still a girl out there (and many more like her) that are thrown into things and places in this life that most of us have never seen or thought about. Deep down I am sure they have the same longings that we all do…to be loved and accepted. Sad part is many don’t know about the One man (the only Holy man) that they can run to.
It’s up to us to show them He’s different .
Would you please join me in prayer for these girls today?
I left work, caught up in my own head with the days events and worries that seem to cloud my already overly active mind. I made a right at the local Weis Market grocery store and that is when I saw her.
Gypsy girl.
She was walking towards the end of the median with a kitten in her arms and a cardboard sign that I could not read. She was dressed in a long flowing skirt and dreadlocks and looked like she just got back from Woodstock. No bags with her- just a kitten on a leash and a look in her eyes of sadness. She couldn’t have been more than 19. Immediately I wondered how she got here to where she was.
Did she not have a family who loved her and wanted her? Did she not see eye to eye with her family and decided that she could do better on her own? Did she think she had the world by the tail and now it was too late to turn back? Perhaps she fell in love with a boy who stole all her childhood dreams…maybe he used her then left her with nothing. Maybe she never heard of the One who knit her together in her mothers womb…or counts all the hairs on her head.
I was in the midst of traffic so I could not pull off to the side – I had to continue in the line of traffic up the hill. The light turned red and I watched her from my side mirror. A truck driver stopped at the light at the bottom of the hill….must have offered her some money…she ran over than ran back. All the while as I am watching this transpire I feel a gentle nudging that said:
“Go Back”.
My response was “But I have to turn left”
“Go back”
I made the left at the green light, traveled about a mile to my husbands place of business. After discussing what this was he told me to go back if I felt I needed to. Just see what the sign said and maybe give her a fresh bottle of water and a little bit of cash. I went back but I couldn’t find her…anywhere. I turned into the Weis parking lot scanning all the cubbyholes and places that one might use for shelter. I slowly drove around the entire building.
She was gone.
My heart sank. I had failed. Failed to react immediately to a nudging that could not be explained with “mans eyes”. And for the rest of the night I said silent prayers for that girl. That she would come to know the fullness of God’s love and find shelter in her storm of life.
I woke up on Wednesday and she was still on my mind. I searched for her as I drove to work keeping my eyes peeled for her. I am not sure what I was going to say or do if I found her but I searched anyway. Perhaps subconsciously I wanted to right my wrong of not following His prompting from the get go. I still don’t know what it was all about.
I got to work and then I heard the rest of the story…the flip side.
I settled in and got things caught up and then I called my best friend who sits just over the cubicle wall. I know she normally travels the same way home from work as I do so I asked her if she went right or left out of the parking lot that night.
She informed me that she turned left cause she had errands to run but had to turn around and go to Wal-Mart (which is right across the highway from Weis). Then she asked the question..
“Did you see the Gypsy’s?”
I froze.
“You mean there was more than one?”
She went on to tell me that when she pulled into the Wal-Mart parking lot she noticed a school bus parked (hidden from view from the highway) stategically against the retaining wall. The bus was painted over to look like something from the 60’s with peace signs everywhere and it was filled with a ton of junk. She said there must have been 15 of them-mostly girls with two older men. All of them had either a dog or a cat with them. No doubt to tug on the heartstrings of animal lovers. The man “in charge” appeared to be a scruffy looking man in his late 50’s. Apparently the girls would go out to panhandle by themselves so not to draw attention to the group of them. My girlfriend said it reminded her of the people that followed the guy down in Waco Texas.
Right there my mouth dropped and my heart sank. Immediately I questioned whether the nudging I felt was from God or was I just being duped. I must admit a little bit of anger rose up in me as I saw this as just one more instance where people would rather beg and steal than to get an honest job and work for a living like the rest of humanity does.
Then I was reminded. BFF told me that even if I would have found the girl that I went back to find, whatever I would have done for her would have been done from a pure heart. A heart that longed to follow the leading of her Lord. Perhaps there was a reason why I didn’t find her. Perhaps it was a test to see if I really would go back. I don’t know.
What I do know is there is still a girl out there (and many more like her) that are thrown into things and places in this life that most of us have never seen or thought about. Deep down I am sure they have the same longings that we all do…to be loved and accepted. Sad part is many don’t know about the One man (the only Holy man) that they can run to.
It’s up to us to show them He’s different .
Would you please join me in prayer for these girls today?
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
Women of Faith Worship CD
Little old me had the pleasure of stopping by the Women of Faith blog the other week just as they posted this exciting opportunity!
Normally, I always come by these opportunities a little too late, so I really didn't think I would have the pleasure of being able to receive the cd or give everyone my honest thoughts on it. Last week when I opened the mailbox and saw a package from Women of Faith it didn't even dawn on me what it really was. I thought it was my confirmation packet for the conference that I will be going to in September in Philadelphia. (Oh and can I just say that this is my FIRST WOF conference and I AM SOOO EXCITED!!)
I know...you couldn't tell.
Well imagine my surprise when I opened it up and found the cd that I was sure I would never get! What a great surprise to brighten my day~! So, without further ado...here is my honest opinion on the Women of Faith Worship cd.
There are a total of 10 songs on the Women of Faith Worship cd that range from songs that make you want to get up and dance to songs that make you want to just sit alone and reflect of the goodness of God. Many of these songs I have heard before by other artists but I must say I do like their spin on them. I believe the original artists would be very pleased with the WOF version of the songs.
*Track 1- God of This City- a great song to start the cd with. I love this song because it reminds me that no matter what -there is NO ONE like our God. It starts out soft and builds with anticipation...by the end of the song you feel like you just want to stand with hands raised in praise and thank Him. .
*Track 2- I Am Free- This song is a great song to chase away those "frumpy feelings" that you just can't shake when you get out of bed. You know the ones that the deceiver tries to fill your head with..."I don't want to go to work" or " I can't do this". Listen to this song and it will chase those thoughts right out of your head and remind you that you are FREE indeed. In fact, I was on my way to work this morning shouting along to all the cars around me. I am sure some of those drivers thought I must be free on a day pass from the local loony bin.
*Track 3- Just Wanna Say- Honestly the first time I listened to this song I didn't really like it. I am not one who likes music that has a lot of horns (trumpets etc) and this song has that. However, after listening to it a few times it actually has grown on me. It actually is quite catchy and I find myself having the words "Said you'd never leave me, Said You won't forsake me" playing over and over in my mind. A great song to sing to remind yourself of the fact that He will never leave you or forsake you.
*Track 4- Lead Me To The Cross- This song speaks for itself with the following lyrics that make me want to sit a reflect on His goodness:
Lead me to the cross
Where your love poured out
Bring me to my knees
Lord, I lay me down
Rid me of myself
I belong to You
Oh lead me, lead me to the cross
Enough said.
*Track 5- You Are God Alone- This is another song that leaves me very much reflecting on His goodness and love. This song starts out very soft and reverent and builds to the point of wanting to stand in awe by the end of the song.
*Track 6- Indescribable- I like the way this song feels very light and easy. Another one that makes you want to sing along and announce "You are amazing God!"
*Track 7- Glorious- This is probably the only song on the cd that I just can't seem to get into. Once again, this song has a lot of horns playing which just isn't my thing. But, if you like that type of jazzy music...you will probably love it.
*Track 8- Healer- If you have ever had the opportunity to hear the Kari Jobe version of this song you may think that this one misses the mark. Its hard to blow me away after hearing Kari's version but the WOF Worship team came really close to the mark here. A good version and a great reminder of how he is our Great Physician.
*Track 9- Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing- This is one hymn that I never tire of hearing. This is a great addition to this worship album.
*Track 10- Amazed- it is hard for me to pick an absolute favorite on this album but if I had to pick just one...it would be this track. I love how calming this song is to the soul. This song is a beautiful reminder of how in awe we should be at how much He loves us.
So, overall I love this album and would recommend it to anyone looking for some great songs to jam to whether in the car or at home cleaning the house. You might want to watch though, when singing along in the car...they just might revoke your day pass!
I do want to say in closing that I was asked to give my honest opinion of the cd whether it be good or bad...and that is what you see here.
May the rest of your week filled with the presence of Him!
Normally, I always come by these opportunities a little too late, so I really didn't think I would have the pleasure of being able to receive the cd or give everyone my honest thoughts on it. Last week when I opened the mailbox and saw a package from Women of Faith it didn't even dawn on me what it really was. I thought it was my confirmation packet for the conference that I will be going to in September in Philadelphia. (Oh and can I just say that this is my FIRST WOF conference and I AM SOOO EXCITED!!)
I know...you couldn't tell.
Well imagine my surprise when I opened it up and found the cd that I was sure I would never get! What a great surprise to brighten my day~! So, without further ado...here is my honest opinion on the Women of Faith Worship cd.
There are a total of 10 songs on the Women of Faith Worship cd that range from songs that make you want to get up and dance to songs that make you want to just sit alone and reflect of the goodness of God. Many of these songs I have heard before by other artists but I must say I do like their spin on them. I believe the original artists would be very pleased with the WOF version of the songs.
*Track 1- God of This City- a great song to start the cd with. I love this song because it reminds me that no matter what -there is NO ONE like our God. It starts out soft and builds with anticipation...by the end of the song you feel like you just want to stand with hands raised in praise and thank Him. .
*Track 2- I Am Free- This song is a great song to chase away those "frumpy feelings" that you just can't shake when you get out of bed. You know the ones that the deceiver tries to fill your head with..."I don't want to go to work" or " I can't do this". Listen to this song and it will chase those thoughts right out of your head and remind you that you are FREE indeed. In fact, I was on my way to work this morning shouting along to all the cars around me. I am sure some of those drivers thought I must be free on a day pass from the local loony bin.
*Track 3- Just Wanna Say- Honestly the first time I listened to this song I didn't really like it. I am not one who likes music that has a lot of horns (trumpets etc) and this song has that. However, after listening to it a few times it actually has grown on me. It actually is quite catchy and I find myself having the words "Said you'd never leave me, Said You won't forsake me" playing over and over in my mind. A great song to sing to remind yourself of the fact that He will never leave you or forsake you.
*Track 4- Lead Me To The Cross- This song speaks for itself with the following lyrics that make me want to sit a reflect on His goodness:
Lead me to the cross
Where your love poured out
Bring me to my knees
Lord, I lay me down
Rid me of myself
I belong to You
Oh lead me, lead me to the cross
Enough said.
*Track 5- You Are God Alone- This is another song that leaves me very much reflecting on His goodness and love. This song starts out very soft and reverent and builds to the point of wanting to stand in awe by the end of the song.
*Track 6- Indescribable- I like the way this song feels very light and easy. Another one that makes you want to sing along and announce "You are amazing God!"
*Track 7- Glorious- This is probably the only song on the cd that I just can't seem to get into. Once again, this song has a lot of horns playing which just isn't my thing. But, if you like that type of jazzy music...you will probably love it.
*Track 8- Healer- If you have ever had the opportunity to hear the Kari Jobe version of this song you may think that this one misses the mark. Its hard to blow me away after hearing Kari's version but the WOF Worship team came really close to the mark here. A good version and a great reminder of how he is our Great Physician.
*Track 9- Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing- This is one hymn that I never tire of hearing. This is a great addition to this worship album.
*Track 10- Amazed- it is hard for me to pick an absolute favorite on this album but if I had to pick just one...it would be this track. I love how calming this song is to the soul. This song is a beautiful reminder of how in awe we should be at how much He loves us.
So, overall I love this album and would recommend it to anyone looking for some great songs to jam to whether in the car or at home cleaning the house. You might want to watch though, when singing along in the car...they just might revoke your day pass!
I do want to say in closing that I was asked to give my honest opinion of the cd whether it be good or bad...and that is what you see here.
May the rest of your week filled with the presence of Him!
Tuesday, June 8, 2010
I Am- Me
This morning I hopped on over the Melissa Taylor's blog. Yesterday she posted some run on sentences that she had her daughter Hayley fill out. Today she filled them out for herself. At the end she challenged readers to do the same thing. Phew- I am glad I did this...but I also glad I am done..LOL.
I am... a wife.
I wonder... why there is so much suffering in the world.
I hear....myself constantly fretting about the worse case scenarios.
I see...the beauty of Gods creation all around me.
I want.....inner peace that nothing can shake.
I am ....a worry wart.
I pretend....to be alright when I am really scared on the inside.
I feel....blessed.
I touch...the file cabinet in my cubicle and get shocked all the time!
I worry...about everything and anything.
I cry....over everything. Happy or sad.
I am....a mother to 2 dogs and 1 cat.
I understand...that my life is not my own and bottom line- its out of my hands and into His. This is still a struggle at times for me.
I say...."Zip It" all the time.
I dream.....of being able to live in the moment and not in the "what-if's"
I try...and may fail miserably...but then I will try again.
I hope...that my life is not a disappointment to those around me.
I am...still growing in the Lord and I know He loves me despite all my insecurities.
I am.....Julie
I am... a wife.
I wonder... why there is so much suffering in the world.
I hear....myself constantly fretting about the worse case scenarios.
I see...the beauty of Gods creation all around me.
I want.....inner peace that nothing can shake.
I am ....a worry wart.
I pretend....to be alright when I am really scared on the inside.
I feel....blessed.
I touch...the file cabinet in my cubicle and get shocked all the time!
I worry...about everything and anything.
I cry....over everything. Happy or sad.
I am....a mother to 2 dogs and 1 cat.
I understand...that my life is not my own and bottom line- its out of my hands and into His. This is still a struggle at times for me.
I say...."Zip It" all the time.
I dream.....of being able to live in the moment and not in the "what-if's"
I try...and may fail miserably...but then I will try again.
I hope...that my life is not a disappointment to those around me.
I am...still growing in the Lord and I know He loves me despite all my insecurities.
I am.....Julie
Sunday, May 23, 2010
Multitude Mondays
151. weekend getaways
152. natures shelter
153. movie night with my favorite man
154. mountain pies
155. campfires
156. a game of dutch blitz
157. a new addition to the garden
158. safe travels
159. home sweet home
160. a game of wiffle ball
161. the muscles that hurt the day after the wiffle ball game
162. new life
163. Cracker Barrel lunches
164. fresh berries
165. rain kissed roses
166. a reminder written in stone
167. fresh cut sunshine
168. Yahweh reminders
169. unexpected visitors on a lazy Sunday night
170. 2 Timothy 1:7
**this list is a continuation of the Gratitude Gifts list that Ann has going on over at Holy Experience. To learn more about it please click on the 1000 Gifts link on the right hand side of my page.
152. natures shelter
153. movie night with my favorite man
154. mountain pies
155. campfires
156. a game of dutch blitz
157. a new addition to the garden
158. safe travels
159. home sweet home
160. a game of wiffle ball
161. the muscles that hurt the day after the wiffle ball game
162. new life
163. Cracker Barrel lunches
164. fresh berries
165. rain kissed roses
166. a reminder written in stone
167. fresh cut sunshine
168. Yahweh reminders
169. unexpected visitors on a lazy Sunday night
170. 2 Timothy 1:7
**this list is a continuation of the Gratitude Gifts list that Ann has going on over at Holy Experience. To learn more about it please click on the 1000 Gifts link on the right hand side of my page.
Monday, May 17, 2010
I'll Wait (Gideon Part 2)
(If you haven't read my first post on Gideon...check it out here.)
I cannot begin to tell you how many times I have read over Judges Chapter 6 over the last two weeks. Way too many to mention. I suppose what has me hooked is how much of Gideon I see in me.
Gideon had a constant need for reassurance. Whatever he was being asked to do..He wanted to be sure he wasn't hearing things. It is easy to see how He was filled with doubt and insecurity.
After God tells him to go and save Israel (in the strength that is his) Gideon immediately begins to question and ask for signs. After God reassures him that He will be with Gideon through it all Gideon raised a question, that I have said many times before....
Gideon said, "If you are serious about this, do me a favor: Give me a sign to back up what you are telling me. Don't leave until I come back and bring you my gift."
I am sure that God would prefer that our faith would be unshakeable but here we see that he does not mind reassuring us we need it. Surprising enough...God doesn't look down at Gideon for asking for a sign or for questioning what the Lord is asking him to do...
He simply said "I'll wait til you get back."
Gideon prepared his offering to the Lord and then followed the Lords orders to save the Israelites. You would think that after an experience like this Gideons faith would be unshakeable, unmovable and out of this world. However, when you read further into Gideon's story we see that Gideon still required verification of whose voice he was listening to. As Gideon was called to go into battle he again asks the Lord for confirmation:
"If this is right, if you are using me to save Israel as you've said, then look: I'm placing a piece of wool on the threshing floor. If dew is on the fleece only, but the floor is dry, then I know that you will use me to save Israel, as you said."
Amazingly enough, when he got up in the morning he rung out the fleece that was wet with dew and it was enough to fill an entire bowl with water! Then Gideon did exactly what I have done time and time again....
"Ok, please don't be impatient with me but let me say one more thing. I want to try something else to confirm that you are speaking to me. This time let the fleece be completely dry while the dew drenches the ground."
Guess what? God made it happen.
As I look at this I wonder if Gideon was that insecure and unsure or did he really not want to do what he was called to do. Either way I see myself there, acting and reacting just like him.
It burdens me to know that I make the same excuses and I doubt the same things and the bottom line is.....at times I am being plain old rebellious.
However, God does not change he is as patient with us today as he was with Gideon. He lets us raise our questions and our doubts and you know what he does?
He waits until we get back.
Perhaps we should prepare our offering....
I cannot begin to tell you how many times I have read over Judges Chapter 6 over the last two weeks. Way too many to mention. I suppose what has me hooked is how much of Gideon I see in me.
Gideon had a constant need for reassurance. Whatever he was being asked to do..He wanted to be sure he wasn't hearing things. It is easy to see how He was filled with doubt and insecurity.
After God tells him to go and save Israel (in the strength that is his) Gideon immediately begins to question and ask for signs. After God reassures him that He will be with Gideon through it all Gideon raised a question, that I have said many times before....
Gideon said, "If you are serious about this, do me a favor: Give me a sign to back up what you are telling me. Don't leave until I come back and bring you my gift."
I am sure that God would prefer that our faith would be unshakeable but here we see that he does not mind reassuring us we need it. Surprising enough...God doesn't look down at Gideon for asking for a sign or for questioning what the Lord is asking him to do...
He simply said "I'll wait til you get back."
Gideon prepared his offering to the Lord and then followed the Lords orders to save the Israelites. You would think that after an experience like this Gideons faith would be unshakeable, unmovable and out of this world. However, when you read further into Gideon's story we see that Gideon still required verification of whose voice he was listening to. As Gideon was called to go into battle he again asks the Lord for confirmation:
"If this is right, if you are using me to save Israel as you've said, then look: I'm placing a piece of wool on the threshing floor. If dew is on the fleece only, but the floor is dry, then I know that you will use me to save Israel, as you said."
Amazingly enough, when he got up in the morning he rung out the fleece that was wet with dew and it was enough to fill an entire bowl with water! Then Gideon did exactly what I have done time and time again....
"Ok, please don't be impatient with me but let me say one more thing. I want to try something else to confirm that you are speaking to me. This time let the fleece be completely dry while the dew drenches the ground."
Guess what? God made it happen.
As I look at this I wonder if Gideon was that insecure and unsure or did he really not want to do what he was called to do. Either way I see myself there, acting and reacting just like him.
It burdens me to know that I make the same excuses and I doubt the same things and the bottom line is.....at times I am being plain old rebellious.
However, God does not change he is as patient with us today as he was with Gideon. He lets us raise our questions and our doubts and you know what he does?
He waits until we get back.
Perhaps we should prepare our offering....
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